Monday, August 6, 2007

Fading Identity

Recently, our team shifted to a new building far away from home and finally i am beginning to feel the pinch. Today morning when i reached our new campus(hate associating the word "office" with myself), i was reminded of the many things that i wanted to do by the time i finished college. I wanted to be an entrepreneur with the "youngest achiever" award, giving loads of interviews on the TV. But unfortunately none has been accomplished or even started...

OK, fine i am applying to b-schools and all that. So what? I am still far away from what i wanted to do. B-school is definitely not my destination. In high school i was so overwhelmed by people such as Alexander and Cleopatra that i wanted to actually rule the world someday so that my name gets etched in the history of the world and not lost once i perish. Over the due course of time that fantasy matured into the want to be an entrepreneur and own a building as huge as our new campus.

After high school i got carried away by the usual competition stuff and here i am sitting in my cube debugging code. Which competition you say? Well, the usual marks saga. I am not sure how can competition land a person into something that she doesn't want. But sadly that's the truth and that will be, till our system and values change.

This is not the future that i dreamt of nor would many "dream" of in childhood. Then why am i not going ahead and ditching my job and starting off with my dream? Probably i am not the risk taker kind. Am i the only person who is doing what she DOES NOT want to do or are there other people too?

Hats off to people like Bill Gates who had guts to ditch the "competition" saga and realize their dreams. As far as people like us, i don't even know why do we keep reading things about these achievers. I don't see us (atleast me) putting it into practice. Oh OK... Our system has taught us how to do theory not practicals right? Then how can we realize it in reality.

I don't think its too late. Probably we all still have time to live our dreams. But how many of us actually know what we want? Probably a flashback to our childhood days will help.

I just hope you and I realize what we actually want and go ahead with that, instead of sucuumbing to the situation. Else we will end up spending 15 hours a day doing something that we never dreamt of or do not actually enjoy doing, till we are 60 and then retire and wonder what happened the whole time in our lives.
A girl losing identity in her cube


Anonymous said...

Carrying a false pretense takes a person no-where.

For you I can say that you live in present. May you achive what you desire..

sathish said...

cheers malini